How Small Practices Change Personality and Mood

After seeing test results, a natural question follows: “Is this just who I am? Can I change it?” The encouraging answer from recent research is that personality and mood are more movable than many people think. The method matters, though, and so do realistic expectations.

Can you change your personality by wanting to?

Nathan Hudson and Chris Fraley asked college students which traits they wanted to change and followed them for 16 weeks (Hudson & Fraley, 2015). Students who wanted to become, say, more extraverted tended to show larger increases in that trait than students without that goal. In a second study, helping participants turn their wishes into concrete behavioral plans appeared to give change a modest extra push.

A later study went further (Hudson et al., 2019). Participants chose small weekly behavioral challenges, such as “introduce yourself to someone new at lunch.” What mattered was whether they actually completed them. The more challenges people completed, the more their traits changed. Accepting challenges and then not doing them was linked to no change, or even movement in the opposite direction. As the paper’s title puts it: you have to follow through.

A meta-analysis of studies on clinical and other interventions also found that personality traits changed on average after intervention, with emotional stability showing the most notable change (Roberts et al., 2017). The evidence that traits are not fixed is steadily growing.

Behavior first, personality later

The common thread is simple: traits change as repeated behaviors accumulate. “Become more outgoing” is too big to act on. “Speak first once in today’s meeting” is something you can do this afternoon.

When choosing a small behavior, check three things:

• Is it concrete? Can you picture when, where, and what you will do?
• Is it small? Could you do it even on a bad day?
• Does it repeat? Is it something you can do weekly or daily, not a one-off?

It also helps to write down why you want the change. “People like extraverts” is a weak reason; “I want to feel at ease with my new team” connects to your life and lasts longer. The point is not to become someone else, but to widen the range of behaviors available to you.

If-then plans

Good intentions often fail to become action. Peter Gollwitzer proposed implementation intentions to close that gap (Gollwitzer, 1999): you decide in advance, “If [situation], then I will [behavior].”

• “Exercise more” becomes “If I walk through my front door after work, then I change into workout clothes right away.”
• “Be more grateful” becomes “If I finish brushing my teeth at night, then I note one thing I was thankful for today.”
• “Procrastinate less” becomes “If I open my laptop, then I spend five minutes on the task I’m dreading most.”

A meta-analysis of 94 independent tests found that forming implementation intentions had a medium-to-large effect on goal attainment, an effect size of about d = 0.65 (Gollwitzer & Sheeran, 2006). The situation becomes a cue, and the behavior follows with less deliberation.

Habits take longer than you think

In a study tracking how long new daily behaviors took to become automatic, the median was about 66 days, with a wide range from 18 to 254 days depending on the person and behavior (Lally et al., 2010). Missing a single day did not meaningfully derail the process. So it takes much longer than the popular “21 days,” and slipping occasionally is fine.

Gratitude and strengths exercises: realistic expectations

Exercises like gratitude journaling or using a signature strength in a new way can help (Seligman et al., 2005). But it is worth being clear-eyed about how much:

Study	Conclusion
Bolier et al. (2013)	Across randomized controlled trials, effects on well-being and depressive symptoms were small
White et al. (2019)	Re-analyzing earlier meta-analyses and correcting for small-study bias, effects became smaller still

These practices are not overnight life changes. Think of them as low-cost, small investments that add up with consistency. If you are going through a very hard time, they are a complement to professional support, not a replacement.

How to use this

1. Pick one trait you would like to shift and shrink it to one behavior you can do this week.
2. Write that behavior as an if-then sentence and put it somewhere you will see it.
3. Each day, simply check whether you did it. If you miss a day, start again the next.
4. After four weeks, notice how natural the behavior has become. Retake the relevant test after a few months to check the direction of change.

Find a trait to work on in the personality test or the character strengths test, and track your progress weekly with the mind check-in.